Reflections…..
May 7, 2007When I was in highschool, I was the type of person that people wrote off as a future star of bumdom. They couldn't see a future for me. Everyone called me an addict, and I drank and smoked a lot.
College came and passed and still my reputation precedes me. Still the same, drug addict (though I left that vice in high school), drunkard, no future in sight. What made it worse was being the lead guitarist of a college heavy metal band and people really thought that my life was gonna be flushed down the drain.
What people didn't know was that, I never neglected my studies. Sure, I would go home at 3am on a monday morning, yet when I get to school, my projects were done, and I would be able to recite in class. I would get an average grade of 84%. Not bad for someone who never really took studies seriously.
When I graduated, I figured that I had enough slacking off. It was time to get serious. This was the time, that I met ex again (friends since college), and I courted her. I had a plan in mind. Get married, build our future and become rich. I graduated with a Political Science major. I wanted to get rich but to do that in politics well, we all know that can't be morally sound. So I worked hard for a year and finally got a scholarship for a Master's degree in Applied Business Economics. Suddenly, I was the most admired person in the clan and among friends. The one with the brightest future and one who holds so much potential to succeed. Indeed, it became true after 4 more years of working. The pinnacle of success came when I was finally appointed a senior manager in a multinational corporation. The right hand man of the president. I was present in board meetings and was part of the overall strategy formulation of the company. Not bad for someone who just turned 30.
But here I am four years later, almost broke. No car, no home of my own and deeply in debt. So what went wrong? I still ask this myself. The last three years have been hellish to say the least. One after the other, my opportunities have faced a blank wall. What made it worse was my marriage falling apart. It was a fall. A very steep one at that. One that I thought I will never be able to recover from. Yet, I still have my sense of humour, and most importantly, I still have the two people who matter most to me. Rising from my fall, am back on my two feet and doing battle still. Although, I recognize that there is still much, much work to be done to attain what I have always dreamed of, I know my future is bright once again.
One thing I've learned afterall that I have experienced is that everything happens for a reason. We may not understand why at first, but towards the end, we begin to realize the principles behind it. I have no regrets. My experiences have moulded me to who I am today. Though, still struggling for success, one of these days I will get lucky, and I will be able to pin success down and keep it till the end of my days.
Previous Comments
Hey Larry,
Yeah, the gloom and doom aura has been blown away by the northern sky. Time to look up and focus on what could be again. Hard isn’t it? But such is life. Hope you iron out your troubles in no time and thanks for the encouragement!
Yes, all things happen for a reason. I’m not really worried about you because I know you man. You have a good heart and God knows what kind of a father and friend you are…. Once again, things will fall into place the soonest. You’ll be on top of your game once again.
Cheer up man! I’ve a throbbing headache to make you feel better…. hahahaha
Hahahaha, while you were out drinking alvs, I was at home, typing out proposals and such.
I actually know they will. Egad, with such a crappy existence for three years, I’m sure I’m due for a reversal of fortune right? Heheehhe.
Posted by ramblingvirus at May 7, 2007, 10:13 amwhat if everything happens for NO reason at all? think about it. i’m trying tom succeeded a bit—the possibilities are both depressing and exciting.
good question eh? i write a blog post now.
Posted by liz at May 7, 2007, 10:52 amLiz,
Are you sure that everything happens for no reason at all? I can safely say that I’m not sure about things happening for a reason as well. Yet, I believe. Why? Cause just like believing in God, it is a choice. Sure, we have no concrete evidence he exists. Yet, you have no concrete evidence that he doesn’t exists. And since none of us have the capabilities to prove the other wrong, my practicality dictates that I err on the safe side.
Simply put, I would much rather believe that there is a God then finding out there is none when I die, than to believe there is NO God then finding out that there is one when I’m dead.
one thing’s for sure…all that happened to you made you a better virus…err person…hehehe…
:) cheerrrssss!!!! malapit ka na talagang maging rich… i know when that time comes, mag blowout ka kasi generous ka.
why thank you very much ms. carey. I will make sure to pass by wherever you are in the philippines and invest in your company when that happens.
Deal? hehehehe.
Posted by ramblingvirus at May 8, 2007, 8:00 amno, no, let’s take god out of it, i dont much believe in him/her/it. i can take you up on that, im agnostic, and no sort of erring is EVER on the safe side.
and i dont care about dying. thats a long time, i dont feel my mortality creeping up to me so far. argument goes kaput.
gah im incoherent. back to work. though technically this is my work. ^_^ but my other work.
Posted by liz at May 8, 2007, 1:52 pmsometimes, there’s just something about life… you should live.
Posted by paolomendoza at May 8, 2007, 6:01 pmLizzy,
Okay lay off the coffee. We shall see, time may make a believer of you yet. Hehehehehe.
Paolo,
Yes, life is worth living. Lot of reasons out there like uhm…… well of course there’s sex (hey, I’m deprived so sue me! hehehe), a beautiful sunrise, smell of newly cut grass, a clear ocean, a smile on a child’s face. Yes, simple pleasures in life. Overall, still so much in life that is worth living.
Posted by ramblingvirus at May 9, 2007, 7:42 amLife is sweet because we experience imperfections. imagine a living a perfect life… it’s nonsense. no excitement. no thrill. no vigor. the fact that you know it’s perfect means you can actually predict what will happen. where’s the fun in that? and this leads to absolutely NO growth at all. yes, it’s cool to cruise life first class once in a while but hey, riding life in a bike with 25 jeepneys blasting their poisonous smoke in your face doesn’t mean it sucks. it’s part of it. all the sweet and bitterness and glory. you’re a cool guy virus. hang in there man. even if you’re in a bike, just keep in mind that you can always keep moving even if traffic is hell.
Witsmeister,
Thank you very much for encouragement. I know I can do this, just don’t know for how much longer. Hard to be overextending yourself for alsmost three months.
Remember video games when you reach the final enemy boss and you keep on dying each time you face him. But you really don’t mind and just keep on trying and trying, knowing that the end of the game is near. Well, that’s how I feel right now. Cripes, gotta know when to save in real life. hehehe.
very impressive. after all that happened you don’t seem so damaged.
what happened to the marriage? the tsismosa in me is dying to ask but of course, i won’t push it. i just had to say it.
Well, I look alright now, cause I allowed myself to mourn after it happened. You should’ve seen me a couple of years ago. I couldn’t even recognize myself.
What happened actually is a long story. Not one I care to relive. To say the least, it was an exhausting ordeal, of course, it almost destroyed who I am. But thank god it’s all over.
hello virus. wasn’t hard to get far on this and learn a summary of what probably happened.
anyway.. I wish you good luck on the annulment thingy.. I might have to ask you one day about that so I know what to do.. bwahahah nah.. I love me husband, even though he’s an insensitive snorer with a knack for beer and chickens (I mean roosters).. hehe he’s a good guy..
and I feel you’re one too.. I know it’s hard, but you’re right.. everything happens for a reason (I wrote about something like this too, although of course without the words ex and failing marriage in it).. what’s important is you did learn something new, and that alone is priceless.
besides. you’ve got kids! hehehe I just hope you can keep your guard up all the time and check for.. err.. exaggerated stories?
take care virus..
and reply to that forum will you? thanks!
ps. i posted this again here… I don’t trust that message board thingy you have there..
Posted by liquidskinn at August 16, 2008, 5:31 pmOh no! She found me! Hahahha! Just kidding Madame.
Thank you for the kind words and yes, the kids are my ultimate reward for all that I have been put through. But hey, what’s past is past and ex and I still talk though, really just in a superficial level. Somehow, that word seems to crop up eh? Hahahaha.
I will try to get to the forums later tonight. I’m still doing a study for our company’s expansion. Yeah, i’m a dickhead for working on a saturday. but my kids aren’t with me so I guess, I can afford it.
Oh yes, welcome!
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Hey, I’m digging you on this!
There’s a lot about our lives that are painstakingly confusing.
I’m sure the day would come when you’ll just laugh at all these adversities. Myself, looking forward to that. It’s undergoing through all these troubles that we’re able to appreciate the pleasant events and victories of our lives.
Cheers!
Posted by larrybored at May 7, 2007, 9:39 am